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Erotic Adventures

Deal or No Deal

2nd February 2011

I don’t get it. There are a load of boxes with a number on them. Standing behind each box is a person. Facing them is Noel Edmonds and a.n.other person, who also has a red box with a number on it. All of the people are ‘ordinary’ folk and then there is Noel who hosts the popular programme, filmed in front of a live studio audience, and occasionally speaks to someone on the other end of a classic phone, known only as the ‘banker’. We never hear the mysterious banker’s voice, Noel translates as if passing on the word of god...

The object of this game show? For a.n.other to select boxes one at a time in sets of three and each box selected reveals a value betwwn 1p and £250,000. As boxes are eliminated after each set of three the banker offers a.n.other a price for their unopened box. They ‘deal’ or ‘no deal’.

Ok, so far, so simple (not the way you described it, Ed.) and it’s clearly just a guessing game and the banker works out the odds. What is the chance she has box X or box Y? Work out the stats make an offer.

Now you and I might think that’s all there is to it but not the studio audience or the folks playingthe game or the large daytime tv audience the programme attracts. Noel expertly ‘works’ the people, playing on their superstitions or their personality traits. A person with a sad story in ‘real life’ – well Noel will expertly weave that story into the unfolding story of the game itself, unashamedly.

After each box is opened A.N.Other will rush across the studio floor to embrace the opener, either in agony or ecstasy. Before opening the box the opener may utter some pithy or profound statement e.g. you’ve gone all odd, was time you went even! Before opening the box to reveal.... You see, you’re hooked! It’s just luck, random chance, no number has a better chance of being the £250,000 as any other!

“My daughter phoned me at 7.23pm yesterday evening, so I’ll have box 12.”

“12 enquires Noel?”

“Yes, 7 plus 2 plus 3 = 12”.

Ok, I jest but it’s nearly that bad, honest! People choose numbers because “it’s my lucky number” or it represents a family birthday or a wedding date or an age or.... I could go on and on. Absolutely no rational, logical or mathematical reason why any of the numbers are chosen.

As the game nears its climax and the original twenty two boxes begin to dwindle and we have say seven or eight boxes some real gameplay comes to the fore as you are able to compute odds. BUT, none of the players ever talk in those terms. Even at the late stage it’s just how many reds (the higher amounts) are left and how much versus how many blues (amounts don’t matter as all less than £1,000). I’m looking forward to a contestant who is a mathematician, or a bookmaker!